Don’t compare your private life to someone else’s public life.
I don’t usually care for inspirational quotes on social media but I recently read one that I can agree with and that was:
“Don’t compare yourself to others, no one is shouting about their failures”
The reason I like this quote so much is because it’s a great reminder that, in the online world, it pays to remember that not everything is as it seems. You only have to scroll through Instagram, with it’s filtered selfies, luxury holiday snaps and shiny cars to know this. However, while we may know deep down that these are only minor glimpses into other people’s worlds, it can be difficult not to compare yourself to everyone we see online and their supposed perfect existence. Whether it’s an influencer who is raking in the cash by endorsing products left right and centre and living a jet set lifestyle or an old friend from school who seems to have the perfect partner, house and children, it’s all too easy to fall into the trap of comparison. Why is their life so much more exciting, happy or easy than yours? The truth is, it probably isn’t, they’re just less likely to shout about the bad stuff! It may be hard to believe but even Kim Kardashian has her bad days, she just doesn’t post it on her Insta – and when she does have a bad day you can bet there will be someone ready to report on it and broadcast it to the world, so she’s certainly not immune from the bad stuff that life can sometimes throw at us.
Even your old school friend who posts about their perfect kids, partner and house will still have difficult times but they aren’t going to post a picture of their child’s massive temper tantrum in the supermarket and how much they wanted the ground to open up and swallow them. Likewise they aren’t going to post about how their partner’s insensitive comment the night before left them feeling insecure or how much they had to scrimp and save to get on the property ladder.
The same goes for beauty. Personally, I like a subtle filter because I have a few laughter lines and dark circles that I like to pretend aren’t there but it’s worth remembering that so often, celebrities and influencers do not post photos of themselves on social media that even vaguely looks like how they do when they are away from the public eye. Everyone has dimples, breakouts, greasy hair days or blemishes that they prefer the world doesn’t see but again, they aren’t going to post that all over their socials!
Another example of when we shouldn’t compare ourselves to others, and this is one I can really relate to myself, is when it comes to achievements.
If you have been reading my blogs for some time now you will know that I am currently studying for both a degree and a qualification in counselling. The truth is, that I might have overcommitted somewhat and the constant approach of a deadline does come with its fair share of stress. This can be exacerbated when I see how much further along with an assignment one of my peers seems to be. In these cases I have to remember that, not only will their daily lives probably look different from mine but also, I don’t get to see their results for each assignment.
Just because they are whizzing through them doesn’t mean their results are perfect. As long as I am happy with my results, does it really matter how anyone else is doing or how much quicker they are submitting their work than me. I’m not behind so what is the problem? And no one who is completely struggling is posting about it.
So, next time you find yourself comparing your private life to the public life of someone else, regardless of who they are, remember that what goes on behind closed doors is probably very different to what you see on social media and even the most perfect life will have times of heartache, boredom and struggle.
